Review: Wolf Creek 2 (2013)

Damn, this movie sucks. The first scene is pretty good, and I like Mick Taylor, but they don't develop any of the characters so it gets boring real quick. If you don't know your leads and care about them, it's all pointless. I wasn't even a big fan of the first film, and this sequel feels even more tedious. I've seen plenty of these kinds of movies. There isn't anything unpredictable or new here. There was a pretty funny but over-the-top sequence with some kangaroos I wasn't expecting; however, I don't know if that was really good or just so silly I laughed. I wish they explored Mick's character more, but they really don't (he's an xenophobic psycho... got it last time... how about something new?), and the foreigners in the outback are pretty much blank slates. It's a shame because the acting isn't bad, but they've got nothing to work with. This German guy has a German girlfriend. He likes her. Australia is beautiful. Great, where the fuck are the characters? What the hell is unique about these people? Why should I care? Don't waste your time.
 

Review: ChromeSkull: Laid to Rest 2 (2011)

I wasn't very impressed by the first film. A ton of practical gore, which is nice, but you need a good story and characters too like John Carpenter's The Thing. Of course, I know very few movies will ever come close to that, and Laid to Rest was just a small indie, but still, they could've done more. This sequel doesn't improve much. I cared even less about the characters, and ChromeSkull sat around watching for most of the running time with an imitator doing the dirty work. You'd think a movie with the title of its killer would actually feature said character racking up a huge body count, but that's not the case here. I like seeing Danielle Harris in just about anything, but she also doesn't have much to do except try to win ChromeSkull's affection. You see more of his organization, but it still doesn't make much sense. Obviously, they have to be rich, but how do they get their money? Why does ChromeSkull record everything? Who is behind it all? Is it entertainment for some sick wealthy group of psychos or what? The problem with a film like this is if you're not invested in the characters, it's just boring.

Review: Malevolence (2004)

Boring slasher flick. You've seen it all before and done a million times better. Just rewatch Halloween or a Friday the 13th film. I didn't care about any of the characters. Not one. Didn't like the killer. He doesn't have a cool mask or costume. No amazing new weapons. Nothing to make him memorable. He's probably the most boring part. Every cliche is present and accounted for. Psycho standing in the background but no one notices? Yep. Picking off idiots one by one? Yep. Slow moving murderer who always gets back up? Yep. Is it scary? No. Is it exciting? No. Is it even remotely good? No. The beginning is a little different, but then it grinds to a halt, and you see a cruddy remake of Carpenter's classic without the talents of Donald Pleasence, Jamie Lee Curtis, etc. It was painful to sit through. Avoid. The fact this has a 5.0 rating on IMDb is ridiculous. Don't be fooled by it.